I stayed with you
by BreitzbachBea
Summary: Yao Wang doesn't know why he thought it was a good idea to let Ivan Braginsky into his life. Riddled with problems, the young Ivan rather makes his own life harder than to enrich it. Slowly however, as both get to know each other better, Yao regrets his decision less and less ... / [Set in my Mafia!AU. Contains Human OCs. Done for RoChu Week 2017]
1. Lost and Found

Yao had expected a few things for his first longer stay in Russia. It was Russia, after all, and Ivan was Ivan. He had seen both do a few confusing things.

He had however not expected his new boyfriend running away from him, his bodyguards and Yaos bodyguards. Finding him in an abandoned house a little outside of the village was again fitting for both Russia's and Ivan's weirdness.

The door was hanging slightly ajar and as he stepped inside, he immediately spotted the big footprints left behind in the layer of dirt and dust.

He followed them upstairs and into a room that was bare except for a wardrobe and a bed which both had seen better days already.

And it was bare of any Ivan, too, at first glance.

"Ivan?"

Yao received no answer but as soon as he stepped a little further into the room, he saw him.

Ivan was lying _behind_ the bed on top of a rug that was undeniably as worn down as the rest of the house.

"There you are! Playing Hide and Seek like a kid, I can't believe it!"

"Am I not allowed to be childish once in a while?" Ivan asked. "Who isn't childish every once in a while?"

Yao was standing in front of the bed and bowed slightly over it. "It's one thing to be childish and another one to leave without a trace and breaking into abandoned houses. You're 22, not twelve, you can't just go off on an adventure."

"I wasn't going on an adventure." Ivan averted his look and turned it back onto the ceiling.

"You also can't just run off to sulk," Yao said. "That's not a mature thing to do."

"You sulk a lot, Yao."

Yao now knelt on the bed to get closer to the other. "First off, that's not true and second, even if – You just ran away! The others are worried! Sheez, don't you ever think about the consequences of the things you do?!"

"I don't," Ivan said. "It's a really neat thing in my opinion, don't you think so too?"

"I think it is absolutely immature and idiotic!"

Ivan sighed. "Yao, you're only 30, have you forgotten all about your childhood?"

"I'm not 30 yet!" Yao objected.

Ivan laughed but then carried on unwaveringly. "Not having to think about consequences or tomorrow is such a nice part of being a kid. Being immature isn't a bad thing."

"But you aren't a kid anymore. You're an adult and have responsibilities. You can't just shrug them off whenever you like it."

"Who says I can't do that?"

Yao opened his mouth to say _Your common sense_ , but then froze. He frowned as he closed his mouth. He turned around and sat down properly on the bed while he tried to think of a better reason to convince Ivan.

"Yao?" He didn't turn around to look at him. "Yao, it is not very mature to sulk."

"I am not sulking!" Yao said and swirled around.

Ivan laughed loudly. Once finished, he put his arms out for a hug. Yao did not take him up on it.

Ivan dropped his arms, shrugged and laid down again to stare at the ceiling.

"You really worried the others," Yao said. Maybe Ivan hadn't realized how upset his friends had been over his disappearance.

"I guessed I would", Ivan replied and Yao furrowed his eyebrows.

"Why didn't you tell them where you were going?" he asked.

"I don't know," Ivan said. Suddenly, he frowned.

Yao raised an eyebrow but did not know else to ask. What question was there to ask when Ivan apparently didn't know an answer?

A gust of wind managed get inside the room through the desolate windows.

Yao just wanted the two of them to get back home , so he pulled his phone out to tell the others were Ivan was. Then they could stop searching and worrying about him.

As he stared at the screen however, he couldn't bring himself to it. Something was going around his head.

"You did a pretty good job at hiding. Have you done this before?"

"Yes." It was silent for a while until Ivan said: "I never told anyone before."

"That you ran away before?"

"No. I mean that I never told anyone where I'd go when I wander off."

"And why didn't you?"

"I didn't want to be found. Not by my father. Or my mama, either."

Yao slowly put the phone back into his pocket and turned to look at Ivan, eyes wide open and eyebrows arched in surprise.

Ivan however was looking at the ceiling with a kind of lost, surprised look himself. As if he didn't understand what he just had said, either.

"Your parents have been dead for a while, haven't they?" Yao asked.

"A little, yeah. I think ... I don't know how many years it has been. My memory always gets hazy when it comes to them; I know mom died before dad, so if she has been around, so was he. And I know that if I am thinking about anything business related, it has to have been after his death. No, wait, sometimes I don't know if I didn't do it for him, either …"

"I understand what you mean," Yao said. "It's been hazy for me, too. Years go on and on and the past melts together ..." He sighed. "But that wasn't why I was asking, I didn't want to remind you of that. I simply thought that it must mean you haven't run away in a while."

"Oh, I did," Ivan said nonchalantly. "It's just that Vicki got fed up with it pretty quickly after I knew her for a while and … she worried about me. So did Irina then and so I kind of stopped it. I don't like making them sad, so today I usually take my alone time when they're not around anyways. But today ... Today I just ..."

Yao saw Ivan struggle to put something so overwhelming that it made him cut all ties with everyone for a while into words.

"It's okay if you can't explain it," Yao said. "I can guess."

"I don't think you can," Ivan said.

Yao snorted. "I've been around this world a little longer and know a thing or two."

"You've not been around me for longer, though." Ivan said. When Yao looked at him, he looked away.

He preferred to not respond to that. If Ivan wanted to get into a huff, then he should get into a huff.

Yao wrote a message to Viktoriya that he had found Ivan, but there was no reception. Oh the joy.

"Ivan, I think we should really go back," Yao said. "Do you think you had enough alone time yet?"

"No," Ivan answered.

Yao sighed. "If we don't get going, you will have more than enough alone time lying in bed with a flu!"

Ivan laughed. A few moments later, he said: "Today is a bad day." He sat up and climbed onto the bed. Before Yao could do anything, Ivan wrapped his arms around him. "Thanks for finding me, Yao."

"You're welcome," Yao said. While the first touch had been cold – Ivan had been here for a while too – his body heat slowly began to warm him up.  
Yao ignored how they should get going in favour of revelling in the comfortable warmth.

"You don't understand me," Ivan said in a rather sad voice, "but that's okay. I don't understand me either. It's nice to know that you're going to stay around me even if you can't do anything with me."

He was warm on the outside but Ivan's words let a cold creep into his bones, heavier than any cold breeze could ever do. Yao turned to face Ivan and he did look sad, too. Eyes half lidded and not even the ghost of a smile on his face, he looked sad and tired. Their eyes locked and a few moments passed when Ivan leant in closer.

As he closed his eyes, so did Yao and Ivan pressed a gentle kiss to his lips.

His lips - and presumably Yaos own - were so cold a shiver run down his spine. "Alright, let's get home, before any of us catches a cold," he said and Ivan smiled.


	2. Insecurities and Acception

Spring was taking its sweet time this year again.

It was still cold outside and it mostly rained. So Yao and Ivan had decided to turn the heater on, tuck themselves under a blanket and watch a movie.

They had agreed on a Chinese crime drama, one of Yao's favourites, with subtitles on.

They could have chosen any other movie however as they lost interest after the first half an hour. Yao had seen it thrice already and Ivan seemed to find the man in his lap more interesting than the ones on screen.

Ivan's arms were firmly wrapped around Yao and latter had put his hands on his. He caressed them with his thumb while Ivan pressed kisses to his hair every once in a while.

Yao had also already planted one or two kisses on Ivan's cheek, who always seemed to smile a little brighter afterwards.

When Yao turned his head to face Ivan this time, he took a second to look at him. Ivan noticed it. This time, Yao kissed him on the lips.

The room was warming up.

"Don't you want to take off your scarf?" Yao asked.

"I don't know," Ivan answered. "I really like wearing it."

"Sure, but aren't you getting a little too warm wearing it?"

"Hm …" Ivan lowered his head a little as he seemed to think about it. „Not yet. I could take off my cardigan, though."

"It's probably for the better," Yao said after he had leant forwards so Ivan could unbutton and take it off. "You're going to sweat at one point anyways if you're wearing it."

"Did you know that my other cousin made that cardigan for me?" he asked as he took it off and placed it beside them on the bed. "Natalya still makes gifts for me every now and then."

"That's a really sweet thing for her to do," Yao said.

"I know, right?" Ivan replied. "I wish I had more of Yekatherina than just the scarf. Especially since I haven't seen her in a while …" He took the scarf and, all with very careful motions, pressed it against his face. "A very long while."

Yao watched the scene with a slight ache in his chest. Ivan's words seemed familiar to him, but ultimately remained quiet.

He slowly leant back. Ivan picked up the hint, let go of his scarf and opened his arms again. His arms didn't stay wrapped around Yao for a long time though.

"Maybe I should switch into a T-Shirt," he said and pulled the blanket away. A chill ran down his sweaty spine.

"Maybe we could just turn the heater down," Ivan suggested but Yao shook his head.

"Not yet," Yao said. "It's only too warm under the blanket."

"Then we could just put the blanket away."

Yao frowned, but then shook his hands once more and put his hands on Ivan's.

"It doesn't feel right to watch a movie without a blanket on," he explained while Ivan was taking his arms away and he made it to the edge of the bed. "If you're planning on a cozy, lazy day, you cannot not spend it under a blanket."

"If you want to stay under the blanket anyways then, why change into a T-Shirt? You could just take off your shirt."

Yao once more froze. "Well, if I do get up to go to the kitchen or toilet, I'll freeze," he explained.

"But the longer you'll stay under the blanket, the warmer you'll get. Like this, you're just getting another T-Shirt dirty. Oh, and if you need to go somewhere, you could just put your shirt on again. Or I'll lend you my cardigan," Ivan offered.

Yao cocked an eyebrow as he pulled the cardigan onto his lap and ran his hand over it.

"I'm sure that this is not what your cousin had in mind when she knitted you this," Yao said.

"What? That someone else is going to wear it? Probably not. But she gifted it to me, it's mine now and I can do what I want with my things."

"Still, I don't want it. I'll just …" Yao had suddenly forgotten why Ivan had offered him his cardigan in first place. "I'll just put on a T-Shirt. Especially because it's ridiculous if I am half naked while you're still all wrapped up!"

He tugged lightly at Ivan's scarf to emphasize his point. In the next moment, he was afraid that even this light tug had been too harsh.

Ivan didn't seem to mind it however. "Well, you're right about that. It is getting a little too warm in here for me to wear all this." He took his scarf off and carefully placed it on the cardigan in his lap. Then he put both beside him and grabbed the hem of his shirt.

He had already pulled it halfway over his head when he asked: "It's okay if I take my shirt off, right?"

"No, because no one walks around shirtless in this house," Yao said deadpan. Ivan pulled his shirt down again, so he quickly add: "It was a joke, I don't even know if you brought a T-Shirt or something you could change into. If you feel too hot, then take it off."

Ivan had shot him a surprised look at first; now he chuckled while he pulled his shirt over his head and dropped it on the floor.

"That's a nice feeling," Ivan said and rubbed his chest. "Nice and brisk."

Yao stared at him with furrowed eyebrows and mouth slightly open. As he noticed Ivan smiling at him, he wrest a comment from himself: "Aren't you cold?"

"It's a good kind of cold. If you're asking me, I wouldn't need the blanket anymore. It's only going to become warmer, anyways."

Ivan leant back and crossed his arms behind his neck.

He went back to watch the movie. Ivan's resting face looked simply bored most of the time, but sometimes, there was the hint of a smile on it.

Yao looked away but as he stared on his feet, he had forgotten again why he had gotten up in first place. Why wasn't he still all huddled together with his boyfriend?

He had no interest in an answer however. His mind was too occupied with something else to remember or to even care about remembering.

Because the sight of Ivan had made him feel something. Goddammit.

It wasn't that he minded the warm feeling that had unfurled in his stomach or that he was ashamed of what it implied. The problem was that it had been a while since he had been in such a potentially intimate situation with someone. He technically had the idea of what _could_ happen but when it came to what _should_ happen, his mind went blank.

Fuck. Fuck it.

"Yao, are you cold?" Ivan suddenly asked and startled him.

"No, I'm fine," he answered and remembered why he had gotten up in first place.

"It's really not that cold anymore, isn't it?"

"It's pretty bearable with a shirt on, yes," Yao answered.

"Do you still wanna change then? Or just come back?"

He heard Ivan pat something soft – presumably his lap covered by the blanket.

He took a deep breath through his nose and then sighed equally deep. "I think you're right, I am only going to get the T-Shirt dirty, too, by sweating all over it." He grabbed the hem of his shirt. Before he took it off, he looked over his shoulder at Ivan. "Do you mind if I just go shirtless as well?"

Ivan blinked and then shook his head. "No, of course not. Why should I?" While Yao pulled his shirt over his head, he added: "I also already saw shirtless while you exercised in your garden. I don't know why I should mind it."

 _Me neither but that is why I am asking._

He had barely gotten out of it when another chill ran over his entire upper body. Without any regards to his previous insecurities about the situation, he quickly crawled back into Ivan's lap and pulled the blanket up.

His lower back was touching Ivan's stomach. It was a warm, pleasant feeling and surprisingly non-sticky.

"Are you alright, Yao?" Ivan asked. Only now he noticed that the other hadn't put his arms around him yet. Ivan's hands rested on his own thighs. As if he wanted to keep the offer open, but was too shy to actually offer it.

"Yes, I am fine," Yao replied. "Are you? Is it alright if I lean back again?"

"Of course," Ivan replied. He didn't sound happy or welcoming; he sounded _polite._

Yao slowly leant back; as his back touched Ivan's front, a short shiver ran over his body again. After a few seconds, the touch became warmer.

"You must have been freezing," Yao said and pulled the blanket up.

"Not at all," Ivan said. His arms slowly wrapped around the other again. "This is more comfortable, though."

Once again, hesitation. Hesitation and reluctance in all of their movements, in everything they said.

Yao sighed heavily.

"Did I do something wrong?" Ivan asked. Yao turned his head to look at him. Ivan was still smiling, but his furrowed eyebrows and slightly lidded eyes showed the same shyness and insecurity he had displayed with every word and every move before.

"You didn't," Yao answered him. "It's just …. " He held his breath.

Ivan still looked him in the eyes, still the same look on his face. Yao wished he could give him an answer to comfort him, but the best he could have mustered was _I haven't been this intimate with someone in what feels like half an eternity and have no idea what to do in this situation_.

"It's nothing," Yao said – a little to convince himself as well. "Don't think about it. Let's just get back to being cozy." He pulled the blanket up a little further and wanted to pull Ivan's arms around him. Instead, he had to stare at them lying on the blanket. "Aren't you cold like this?"

"I'm fine," Ivan said. He rested his head on top of Yao's. "Are you alright now, though? Or are you cold?"

"I'm good," Yao said. He didn't like this stupid, pointless, overly polite asks about trifles like the damn temperature. He simply had wanted to spend a casual day watching a movie and letting Ivan be his personal heater. "I'm fine, my teddy bear," he thus added.

He heard Ivan chuckle as much as he felt it. Ivan pressed a kiss to the top of his head.

Yao tried to concentrate on the movie, but it was hard to focus when Ivan kept pressing kisses to his hair. When he hugged Yao tighter, the frustration of being unable to return any kind of display of affection, was unbearable.

"You're going to pin my arms to my body if you keep hugging me like that," he said and pulled Ivan's arms first apart and then under the blanket. There were cold and were his arms touched them, goosebumps ran across his skin.

Other than a surprised, almost inaudible gasp, there was no reaction by Ivan at first.

The he laughed and wrapped his arms tight around Yao's waist und the blanket, pressed his front to Yao's back.

"I'm sorry," he said and Yao couldn't help but chuckle as well.

"You're good," he said. While one hand remained on Ivan's, he reached out for his head with the other one to press a kiss to Ivan's cheek.

The room had just gotten warmer in the last seconds.

Yao had begun to caress Ivan's hair behind his ear, eyes fixed onto the TV again, when Ivan asked: "What's the movie about even?"

Yao shot him an irritated look. "We're halfway through the movie and you're asking what it's about?"

"We're only halfway through?" Ivan asked, a stunned look on his face.

"Fine storytelling takes time," Yao explained. "And it's a shame you don't appreciate it."

Ivan snorted and smiled at him. "I was distracted."

Yao needed a second to actually take the picture in front of his eyes in. Then his heart skipped a beat before it went on a little faster.

"That's fair, I guess," he replied. He could feel Ivan's breath on his cheek.

He could feel it until he closed the small gap between them and kissed him on the lips.

It was simply a short peck. "I hope that was okay," Ivan said after he had pulled away.

"Of course it was," Yao said. He couldn't help but smile about Ivan's coyness. While he had seen him embarrassed or confused, he hadn't seen him _shy_ yet.

It was an adorable experience. Their faces were still close. He noticed that Ivan was blushing. It wasn't strong, but even the lightest shade of pink stood out on his pale face.

Yao kissed him on the cheek and he chuckled. Merely a moment later, Yao kissed him on the lips.

"And that's the reason I couldn't pay attention to the movie," Ivan said.

Yao stopped caressing him behind his head and pulled his arm underneath the blanket again. "I haven't kissed you throughout the entire first half of the movie. That's not even a lousy excuse, that is a lie."

Ivan leant in until their noses touched. "You're lying. You did kiss me. Just on the cheeks."

"And that's really enough to make you lose focus?" Yao asked. He dropped his look. Looking the other in the eyes up so close gave him a headache.

Ivan pulled away a little and kissed his temple. "Your hair also distracted me. It looked so soft that it was hard to not bury my face in it the whole time."

" _That_ is a lousy excuse," Yao said. Ivan laughed and hugged him tighter.

"It's also hard to get back into it once you didn't pay attention for a few minutes …"

"If you don't want to watch the movie, just tell me so."

"Well, if it's so important to you, I'll of course pay attention to it." Ivan looked back at the screen.

Yao pouted and rolled his eyes. After a few moments, he went back to look at the screen as well.

He caressed the back of Ivan's hand with his thumb while he continued to watching the movie.

He could feel Ivan's chest heaving up and down. The arms around his waist and the hands under his were warm. It was hard to watch a movie he had seen already when something much newer and more exciting was surrounding him.

Yao liked the pace so far. Ivan seemed to enjoy their newfound intimacy as well. The warm feeling in his stomach stayed while the doubts drifted away.

"Yao are you testing me?" Ivan asked after Yao had kissed him on the cheek again. He wanted to ruffle through the fluffy, blonde hair again. "Or do you not want to watch the movie either."

"I already saw it thrice," he said. "I don't have to pay attention all the way through anymore."

"Ah, I see," Ivan said and smiled at him. Yao kissed him on the cheek again and as he kissed him again, his hand found its way behind Ivan's ear again.

Ivan leant into the touch. "Do you want me to watch the movie now or do you want to bother me?"

Yao's fingers stopped moving with a tiny quiver. "Am I bothering you?"

"Not at all," Ivan said. He leant over Yao and kissed him.

Their lips had barely parted when they kissed again.

Yao's fingers dug into Ivan's hair. Ivan's hand was twitching slightly when he pushed his right arm upwards. His fingers were around his side, his thumb on Yao's chest.

"If we keep on kissing like that, I am going to strain my neck," Yao said. Ivan laughed and pulled away, together with his arm.

"If you would turn around, then it would be more comfortable," he said.

Yao contemplated it. He also contemplated where this switch of position, that would bring them even closer, could lead to. Every outcome seemed as likely as the other and demanded the same thought until Yao's entire head was just one, big mess.

"Or we stop kissing and watch the movie," Ivan pulled him back to the here and now.

Yao's thought abruptly went silenced as he looked at him. The solution to his problem was right in front of him, because simply _asking_ Ivan would half the outcomes and thus the mess in his head.

"What do you want to do?"

"That feels like a trick question," Ivan answered.

"It's not."

"So you're not going to be mad if I'd rather keep on kissing you instead of watching the movie?"

"Of course not," Yao said with a frown. "We'll just watch it properly sometime else then."

Ivan chuckled. "Alright. Then I would rather give you more kisses."

Yao pulled Ivan's arms away and turned around to face him. He knelt, one leg each next to Ivan's sides, and held onto the headboard. After he kissed him, he sat down on Ivan's lap and put his arms around his neck.

The blanket had slid down, but Yao barely noticed it. The room wasn't cold enough anymore to send shivers down his spine.

When Ivan put his arms around him and pulled him in for another kiss, he however noticed the room was warm enough to make him sweat in his pants.

He decided to ignore it at first. Their chests touched and Yao's hands found their way into Ivan's hair.

For the first time today, Yao hadn't overthought his actions when he opened his mouth slightly during the kiss and his tongue darted out.

He regretted it the very next moment. Ivan winced and pulled away.

Yao felt ten times hotter than already when the blood shot into his head. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry if you didn't want that."

Ivan, who had his eyes wide open and his eyebrows shot up in surprise already, seemed to intensify the look. "No, it's fine." He smiled. "I don't mind it, I just wasn't prepared."

Yao held his breath for a second, before he sighed and smiled back.

"I'm sorry Yao."

"What are you sorry for?"

Ivan's smile had a shy touch again. "Because I'm so … awkward and holding back. I just haven't been together with someone in a long time." His graze dropped and he chuckled. "To be honest … I've never been this close with someone before."

Yao furrowed his brows. While he recognized his own problems in the first sentence, the second one made him stop short.

"What do you mean by 'this close'?" he asked.

Ivan still avoided to look at him – as well as he avoided an answer. Finally, he looked up and said: "I've never lost my shirt when I was kissing someone."

Yao allowed himself to think about what that meant for a few moments. Then another few moments to find the right words.

"So you've never went further with anyone than kissing?"

"No."

Yao snorted and smiled. "I haven't even kissed anyone in what … feels like forever for me, too. So I think we're kind of the same page here."

Ivan chuckled. The longer he kept looking into Yao's eyes, the more genuine it sounded.

"So I don't have to be afraid that I'm doing something wrong?" he asked.

"Of course not! You should never be afraid of doing something wrong!" Yao's words rung in his own ears and the irony dawned on him. "I guess both of us shouldn't think about it too much at all. We should just … do what we feel is right."

"Alright. That sounds like a good idea." A few seconds passed in silence until he kissed Yao again. "We'll just figure out how this all works together."

Yao ran his fingers through Ivan's hair. "Exactly. We'll figure this out, step by step."

Ivan smiled. "Do you think a good next step would be taking off our pants? Because I'm way too warm in them."

"Yes! That is a good next step! For real, did we turn this heater onto 'Sun's surface' or what's up with it?" Yao asked.

Ivan broke into laughter. He felt the vibrations when the other buried his face at his shoulder. No coyness, no reservation in this laughter. Yao felt as if its vibrations suddenly ran through his entire body.

Rain drummed against the window while spring had finally arrived inside.


	3. Sunflowers

Yao remembered that back when he was a teenager, he and his crushes often bonded over asking each a lot of unimportant questions. What each other's favourite animal was, or which colour they liked best or their favourite flower.

Those silly ask games were a thing of the past anyways but even if they weren't, he'd never need it to find out what Ivan's favourite flower was.

"Ivan, they've just let me go home yesterday. The flowers you sent me while I was in the hospital haven't wilted yet," Yao said after he had opened the door and looked down on yet another bouquet of sunflowers.

Ivan blinked before a smile lit up his face. "So you kept them?"

"Yes, of course I did," Yao said, though he wondered why he had said of course. It wasn't a matter of course to keep them and next thing he wondered about was why he had kept them then.

"Aww, that's so nice of you! I thought you'd leave them at the hospital or they'd throw them away so I brought you new ones" Ivan said and held the flowers into his face.

Yao saw his neighbours, a couple around his age, pass by on the sidewalk and threw them a short, but confused glance.

"I see, thank you, but come in already," Yao said and stepped aside to let Ivan inside. After he closed the door he turned around to him. He was taking his shoes off.

"Ah, now I can smell you kept them, too," Ivan said, still with a smile on his face.

"Give me those," Yao said and reached for the flowers. Ivan only handed them to him once he was finished with taking of his shoes and had straightened up. "And well, it'd be a miracle if you _wouldn't_ smell it. The entire hospital room was stuffed with them and I had to spread them all over my house to find a space for all of them." Yao sighed and quickly rubbed his temple. "Seriously Ivan, one could have thought I had barely escaped an assassination attempt when they walked into my room. I suffered from simple food poisoning, that really does _not_ justify 5 flower bouquets within _two_ days." Yao's thoughts stopped in their tracks and trailed one step back. He squinted. "Although you can never be too sure that it wasn't an assassination attempt. It wouldn't be the first time someone tried to poison me."

"It's really not unlikely," Ivan said and followed Yao into the kitchen. "The doctors found nothing?"

"They said they found something that is most likely a food poisoning and after I told them I had dinner at a not very trustworthy place lately, they called it a day and said it had to be food poisoning."

Yao went through his cupboards. "But even if I had almost been murdered, there would have been no need to send me so many flowers. I don't even know if I have another vase for them." He closed yet another cupboard. "Maybe I'll have another one in the living or the bedroom …"

"Can I help you with that?" Ivan asked. Yao turned around and cringed when he found Ivan standing behind him.

"No, I'm fine. Just … sit down somewhere and wait until I took care of this. Then we can have tea together."

"Are you sure you don't want a hand? I know some of your cabinets are really huge and if you find a vase on the top shelf, I wouldn't want that you accidentally break it. Or that you break yourself trying to reach it."

"I am not made out of Porzellan, damn it!" Yao retorted. "Just …sit down and wait for me as I as I said!"

Yao pointed at the kitchen table – with the sunflowers still in his hand. "And take those!" he said and shoved the bouquet into Ivan's hands.

Ivan grinned and wrapped his fingers around the stalks. "Alright Yao!"

While he was going through the cabinets in his living room, Yao once more wondered why he had kept all those flowers and even accepted yet another bunch of them. Sure, it was rude to decline a gift and Ivan surely only had the best intentions. Did he still really need to allow his entire house to smell like sunflowers for probably days on end?

He came back with a vase nonetheless, but said "I have no idea where I could put those, though," as he filled it up with water.

"I'm sure you'll find a spot for them," Ivan said. "You could put them right onto the table for example. Or maybe you could put them into your bedroom."

"I'll already have one standing on my nightstand," Yao said and placed the vase on the middle of the table. Ivan put the flowers in. "I think this is a place as good as any."

"I like it," Ivan said. He looked from the flowers around. "Makes this spare room immediately a little more lively."

"I don't need my kitchen to be 'lively', it becomes lively when I cook and for that, everything has to be in its exact place," Yao explained. He crossed his arms and stared at the flowers. "Why exactly sunflowers, if I may ask?"

"Hm?"

Yao turned to look at him. "Why only sunflowers? Why didn't you send me some other kind of flowers as well?"

"Would you like to have some other kind?" Ivan asked.

"That's not the point. And I think I'll have enough flowers for a while now. I simply find it strange that you're giving me the same flower over and over again.

Ivan shrugged. "Well, first off, there's plenty of them in Russia. I heard that there used to be even more back in the day and that basically everyone was growing sunflowers. While that's not the case anymore, they're still easy to come by. People grew them en masse because it's a really useful flower, you know? They make they make healthy little snacks for example."

Ivan plucked a seed out of one of the flowers and ate it.

"Don't eat the flower," Yao said had watched him with a sceptical and concerning look on his face.

"Why? Don't you make a lot of medicine out of flowers and the lie, too?" Ivan asked and swallowed the seed.

"Yes, but I ... You can't just stuff unwashed plants into your mouth!" Yao said. "Next think you'll know is that _you're_ in the hospital because of poisoning. There's pesticide on everything these days, and if you buy some things in the city here, there's also the smog problem."

"I'm sure I won't die from eating a few sunflower seeds," Ivan said but did refrain from plucking out anymore seeds. He kept looking at the sunflowers however.

"I also like them because … well … they're looking like little suns with their big yellow petals. I like that."

Yao looked back at the flowers and tilted his head. The petals did indeed remind him of how a child drew a sun, with rays of light shooting out of it.

"Do you want a tea?" he asked.

"Sure. Did you know you can make tea out of sunflowers as well?" Ivan said. "They're really versatile flowers, so if yours begin to wilt you don't have to throw them away necessarily.

"Really?" Yao asked while he filled the kettle with water. "What I can use them for?" He put the kettle on the stove and turned it on.

"For one, you can eat the sunflowers just the way they are," Ivan explained. Yao pulled a chair out and sat down. "Or you make oil out of it. Sunflower oil was mad popular when the sunflower was introduced to Russia, that's why everyone was planting and cultivating them."

The water began to boil as Yao listened intently.


	4. Animals

"That's your kitty?"

"Yeah! Isn't she adorable?!"

Huan lifted the small kitten off his arms and Irina made a high pitched squeal.

The Russians had just arrived at Yao's house, but before they could all settle down at the kitchen table, a small black and white kitten walked into the room.

"We found her a few days ago when we had something to do at the countryside," Huan explained. "Their old owners didn't care whether it was there or not, so I asked if we could take it home. I always wanted a pet."

"I didn't want the cat," Shu said. "I don't like it." She earnt a surprised look by Irina; Ivan and Viktoriya shot her a confused one as well.

"Why not?" Viktoriya asked.

"Indeed! Look at her, Shu! She's so sweet!" Irina said to Shu who didn't move a single muscle. Irina looked at Huan, who had watched his sister's statement with a kind of embarrassed smile. "What's her name?"

"We named her Bo. I thought Lilly would be a cute name, too, but Yao and Shu said they liked Bo better."

"I don't know why you should give an English name to a Chinese cat," Shu said. "And Bo has a nicer meaning, anyways." She turned to Viktoriya. "Nevertheless, I don't see why we would need a cat at all. They're useful animals, but we have no use for them. We're living in a city in well cleaned houses, we don't need a mouse catcher. I thought of getting a bird."

"We used to have two cats in the old stable where I learnt horseback riding," Viktoriya said. "Two big round fluffy things. But Cats don't have to be useful. They're already useful when they're being adorable little fluffballs."

"And birds are old people animals," Yao said

"Are you getting one then?" Ivan said and looked at him with an excited smile.

Viktoriya bit her lip and had to hold back a laugh when Yao shot Ivan a disgruntled look

"You watch your mouth, boy" Yao said but Ivan kept smiling. Yao boxed him into the side with his elbows and Ivan laughed about it.

While the two men across them were busy bickering, Shu told Viktoriya: "Birds are peaceful animals. And intelligent. I like that."

"Cats are smart, too!" Huan said. He had handed the kitten to Irina by now, who was pressing her to her chest and cooed at her in Russian.

Vicki's eyes widened and she pressed her hands in front of her mouth, yet could not keep a small squeal from escaping.

"Viktoriya?" Shu asked and Irina lifted her head to look at her.

"Look at my Lapotschka and her kiska," Viktoriya said, her voice merely a whisper. "I cannot take this, they are too adorable," she said and alongside with a smile, a blush began to spread across Irina's face. Bo used that chance and began to climb onto Irina's shoulder.

"I think the weather is getting better," Huan said after he had taken a look outside. "Maybe we should take her outside." He looked at Yao. "May we? I'm sure she'll love to be outside again like she was at the farm! I'll promise I make sure she'll behave well!"

"Of course," Yao said. "Sitting in the Garden and drinking tea sounds better, anyways. I'll be making some right away!"

"I can make Tea, Yao," Shu said and stood up. With quick and determined steps she strode faster around the table than Yao could stand up.

Shu already reached for the teakettle when Yao put a hand on her shoulder.

"So do I," he said. "Go outside with the others, will you? It's my house, after all!"

She stared at him and he gave her a smile and a pat on the shoulder.

"Come with us, Shu," Irina said. Bo was climbing around on her shoulders with wonky steps.

"Yeah, let's get you a little closer to the little critter," Viktoriya said and grabbed her arm. Shu sighed almost unnoticeably, but let herself being taken outside without any protest.

"You can go, too, Ivan," Yao said as he saw him still sitting at the table.

"I'll wait for you," Ivan said and stood up. "Do you need help?"

"No, thank you," Yao said and closed the kettle after filling it up with water.

Ivan looked around while Yao put the kettle on the stove and searched for a tablet he could put the cups on.

"If you're not getting a bird, is there any other kind of pet you would like to have, Yao?"

"Well ..." Yao said. He cleaned the tablet of the imprints the tea cups had left the last time he had used it. "I've actually been thinking about getting myself a dog. I only haven't done it yet because a dog requires so much attention and exercise and I am not sure if I can really take care of one, though." He sighed and put the rag away. "They're so cute though! If I will get one, it's going to be either a Chow-Chow or a Pomeranian! The most important thing is that it's fluffy and cute!"

Ivan laughed. "You like cute and fluffy things, don't you?"

"A lot," Yao replied truthfully. When Ivan didn't answer, he looked over his shoulder.

Ivan leant against the table, his arms propped up on it, and a touched smile on his face and a slight dreamy look in his eyes as he looked at Yao.

Yao put the cup he was holding down and snorted. "I see."

"Do you think I'm fluffy and cute, too?" Ivan asked and dried the tablet with a kitchen cloth.

"I thought that was why you gave me that face. "Well, would I keep you around if it wasn't for you being fluffy and cute?"

"Well," Yao heard his table creak and threw an alarmed look over his shoulder. Ivan was now sitting on it, his hands on his knees. "I'm fine if that's the only reason you keep me around."

Yao sighed and the smile on his face slowly lost its intensity. Thinking about why he actually stayed with Ivan only made him weary.

"It's one of the reasons. What about you?" he asked to change the topic. "What kind of pet do you want?"

"I would love to have a bear." Yao chuckled, but frowned when he looked back at Ivan who sat there with an honest smile and not a sign of mischief in his face.

"And what if you had to chose a pet you could actually have?" he asked, confusion still written into his face.

"There are people in Russia who work with bears," Ivan said. "Sure, they're no pets but you'd still be able to care for them as one while not forcing them to be something that they aren't."

Yao thought about it. "I think you could see it like that. Maybe when we're retired, we will just start to breed bears with our dog and live in a hut somewhere in the nowhere.

Ivan's face lit up. "That sounds absolutely wonderful! Let's really do this one day, yes Yao?"

Yao chuckled and turned around again to pour the hot water into the cups. He was startled and a few drops hit the tablet when Ivan hugged him from behind.

"We could live somewhere in Russia. You could cuddle with the dog or the bears to keep you warm. Or with me, of course." Ivan pressed his face into Yaos hair and gently rubbed against it.

"Don't mess up my hair," Yao said. He managed to not spill any more water and put the kettle away.

Ivan chuckled but stopped rubbing. Instead, he pressed a kiss to the top of it.

"That'd be a peaceful life," he said. "And Vicki and Irina and Shu and Huan could visit us for tea and to play with our pets

"How peaceful a life with a bear can get. Not to mention one with a bear and _you_ ," Yao said and looked up at Ivan. He smiled, eyes half lidded. "My teddy bear," Yao quietly added. Ivan chuckled and hugged him a little tighter. "And now let go of me and grab the tablet, the others are waiting. I also don't want to leave Shu and Huan together out of sight."


	5. Ballet

From the outside, the gym looked empty and closed. No lights burnt and no one was seen to be in darkness, either.

Behind a door at its back however, the lights still burned and mirror that covered one entire wall made them seem brighter than they were.

"Seems like you all had a lot of fun today," Yao said.

He was sitting on a vaulting box, just like Ivan. They were the only ones left; the owner had been gone before the Chinese had arrived and the ballet instructor had left after her lesson had been finished. All six of them had stayed a little longer to talk, but then Viktoriya and Irina had wanted to go home to prepare some late dinner. They had taken Shu and Huan with them and Vicki had told them to not waste much more time since they would be waiting for them at their flat.

"I did for sure," Ivan said. "But the most important thing is that Irina had. Have you seen how proud she was! You should have seen her face when we arrived here and she realized what was happening! She cried! Oh, Irinushka …"

Ivan's eyes lit up when he recounted his friend's joy and a smile grew on Yao's face. Tears glistened in Ivan's eyes.

"Did I tell you that she always wanted to be a Ballerina?" Ivan didn't look at Yao when he asked the question. He had spaced out.

"You did," Yao said. "More than once. And she mentioned it a few times herself as well."

"But did I also tell you why she never picked it up?"

Yao frowned. He was sure either Ivan or Irina herself had told him. Maybe he had also overheard it in a talk between Viktoriya and Shu.

"Don't tell me, I have it right on the tip of my tongue," Yao said. He had crossed his arms, a frown on his face and his shoulders had sagged slightly while he was trying to remember.

Ivan's eyebrows arched and his eyes widened for a split second when he looked at him. Then he broke into laughter which echoed off the walls.

Yao shot him a disgruntled look, but left it at that.

Ivan calmed down and kept quiet for a while, but watched Yao with a smile. "Are you done thinking?" he asked at one point.

"...yes," Yao answered and Ivan laughed again. He straightened up and shot him another glare.

"You and your stubbornness can be so funny," Ivan said.

"I can only give that back. So why did she never pick up ballet."

Ivan's bright grin faded to a rather melancholic smile. "Because everyone told her she'd be too fat for a Ballerina," he said. "She said her friends and family all either told her that someone with her body simply couldn't be a Ballerina or they in a more roundabout way they told her she'd only face rejection if she'd try and spare herself the hurt."

"Ah," Yao said. There was something heavy about the silence now. "Considering what I saw today, she was doing incredibly well. It's a shame all those people who kept her from it didn't see it."

"It is," Ivan said. "They would have been in for such a surprise." He smiled as he carried on. "I wish I could shove it into the face of everyone who made her thought it wouldn't work."

Another moment filled with silence and thoughts went by. "And we all had so much fun. The teacher was really strict but she never said one single bad thing about Irina's build. She only pushed her, pushed all of us to try harder. She wouldn't accept anything halfassed. Vicki and Irina didn't disappoint her." He laughed. "I did however. It's incredible how bendy a ballerina has to be, I couldn't even reach my toes!"

"You also have a longer way down to you toes than the girls," Yao said and Ivan laughed again. "You trying to reach your toes … I would have loved to see that. What a shame we came so late."

"If you want to see me and my stretching skills," Ivan said and jumped to his feet. Yao raised an eyebrow but slowly grinned as Ivan stretched his arms and rolled his shoulders.

With a "Hah!" he bent over and his fingers reached out for his toes. No matter how hard he bobbed up and down however, his fingertips and his toes were always a few centimetres apart.

"Almost there," Yao said. Ivan straightened up and pushed his shoulders backwards, hands on his back.

"I guess you're right and I am just too tall for this," he said.

Yao chuckled. He smiled when Ivan said: "If you had been here from the start, you could have tried it all yourself."

"I am sure Shu and Huan would have had a lot of fun," Yao said.

"Would you have not wanted to try it?" Ivan asked.

Yao shrugged. "I don't know any reason why I shouldn't have."

"Maybe because you'd be too old and tear yourself a tendon," Ivan said. He seemed to be peacefully smiling until Yao discovered a mischievous sparkle in his eyes.

"I'm in my prime age, thank you!" Yao replied. "And in excellent shape, too!"

"Prove it," Ivan said and Yao didn't have to be told twice. He jumped to his feet and bent over. He couldn't reach his toes either. As he straightened up again, he heard Ivan chuckle.

"I did it too fast," he said and pushed his shoulders back before he went to stretch his arms. "You'll see."

He bent over again – and touched his toes.

Ivan clapped and Yao went back up with a satisfied smirk. "You'd wish you'd be as bendy as me, youngster. Too old! Don't make me laugh!"

"You have to reach a far shorter way down than me, though," Ivan said. "Nevertheless, you still would have been more fit to take part in the lesson than me."

"I suppose so," Yao said when Ivan's face lit up.

He clapped his hands once. "We should try to make a Ballerina out of you!"

"What?!" Yao asked when Ivan had already put an arm around his shoulders.

He pointed towards the barre that ran along the wall covered with mirrors. "Let's see how bendy you really are. I remember enough from the lesson to give you your own, little, private one."

As Ivan gently nudged him towards the wall, Yao braced his feet against the floor. "Ivan … Ivan, the others are still waiting for us!"

Ivan loosened his grip, his hands felt almost as if they lingered above his skin. "I'm sure they'll understand," he said yet with the same excited smile.

"Viktoriya surely isn't going to be amused if we come an hour late for dinner," Yao said.

"Maybe. But she'll understand when I told her that you just wanted to learn a bit more about Ballet, too. And Irina will be delighted to have yet another person to talk about it."

Yao sighed. "Fine," he said and walked over to the barre.

Ivan followed him. As Yao gripped it and wanted to ask what now, Ivan commented: "Maybe you should take off your pants. I don't want them to get ripped during all that stretching – "

"I am not going to take my pants off, Ivan! They won't rip because of a little stretching!"

"Are you sure?" Ivan said. "You'll – "

Yao looked the other straight into the eyes. "I am _very_ sure. Now just get on with it."

Ivan stepped beside Yao and held onto the barre as well. "First and foremost, you've got to stretch your legs. No matter how much you'll stretch them, it'll never be enough." He took a small step backwards and then pulled his leg up. When his calf hit the barre, Yao could feel its vibrations clear and long in his arms. "Ballet is not necessarily about strength, but about flexibility."

While Ivan was hopping back another step and flailed his arms to keep balance, Yao put his leg up as well.

Yao didn't notice how much time passed while they were doing stretches. Even when the occasional pauses of silence made the room feel colder and time slow down, Ivan usually interrupted those moments with a little chatter or another comment.

When Yao did the splits on the floor, Ivan's eyes once more lit up.

He clapped while Yao tried to keep his balance and smile smugly.

"Not only is that extremely cool, I am also impressed that your pants still didn't rip," Ivan said and he offered Yao his hand to get back up. Yao didn't take it and instead lifted himself up with his hands at each side of his body.

"Jesus Christ, did you rip _your_ pants before we arrived or something? It's really not that big of a deal." He was almost back on his leg, when his cell phone rang and threw him out of balance.

Before he hit the floor, Ivan grabbed his arm.

"Ouch."

Ivan pulled him closer and, hands on both side of his chest, up. "I'm sorry. Your arm is alright?"

"It is, don't worry about it," Yao said and ignored the pain in his joint when he pulled his phone out to answer.

"Yes?"

"Shu here. We're worried about you and Viktoriya is about to leave the flat to go looking for you. Did something happen?"

Yao blinked twice before snorted quietly. "We're alright, tell Vicki that she doesn't need to come look after us – "

"I just heard her slam the flat door, but I can go after her," Shu answered. Yao had a hard time to restrain from sighing. "Also, if you are not in trouble, then what is taking you so long? If I may ask that."

"We were just … messing around, Ivan showed me some of the things they did during their little Ballet lesson today. We're sorry for making you wait, please tell that the others, too."

"I will. Are you coming soon then?"

"Yes, of course. I'm sorry, see you later."

"Until later," Shu said and he hung up.

"Vicki got so fed up with us that she's coming to get us," Yao explained.

"Did Shu tell you that?" Ivan asked.

"Yes," Yao replied and went to get his jacket, but Ivan grabbed his shoulder.

"Do you really want to go already? We didn't do any real Ballet stuff yet," Ivan said.

Yao furrowed his eyebrows and, his irritated stare still on Ivan, pulled his shoulder away. "I think we let the others wait for long enough, didn't we? Don't be such a selfish child, Shu even worried about us. I'm sure so did Viktoriya and Irina."

"If they really worried a lot about us, Vicki would have called me. Just one thing, Yao, it won't take long, I promise."

Yao looked at him – and his anger melted under Ivan's hopeful smile.

"Alright – What should I do? One of these curtsies?" He asked and crossed his legs.

Ivan laughed. "I think that would be too easy. I thought that we should do a lift."

Yao frowned. "A lift?"

Ivan opened his arms. "You jump into my arms and I'll lift you up!"

Yao's eyebrows shot up. "I don't think that's good idea Ivan."

"It's fun, I promise! And easy! Didn't you see me doing it with Vicki and Irina earlier?"

"Yes, but … You two have been doing this all day. With a professional around!"

"I don't see how this makes a difference." Ivan still held his arms out and cocked his head. "Are you afraid you won't make it? You've been doing great so far and you'd make a great Ballerina!"

"Just because I can do the splits?!" Yao said. "I can't really see where you get this assumption from!"

"Ah come on Yao," Ivan said and put his arms down. "Are you afraid something goes wrong? You train martial arts in your free time, do you really think a simple lift is too much for you."

"Why do you think I just don't want to do it because I'm not fit enough for it?" Yao asked back. He cocked an eyebrow but was only met with a frown.

"Are you afraid I'll drop you? I lifted Irina. She's your size and she got a few pounds more than you. Come on, trust me Yao."

Ivan put his arms out again and smiled at him. Bright, genuine and inviting.

"Fine. What do I have to do?"

"You'll just have to run towards me," Ivan explained and walked backwards across the room. "I'll grab you, you jump, and I'll lift you up."

"And that's all?"

"That's it." Ivan stretched his arms out towards him. "Just don't hold back, okay? And don't hesitate. It needs to be one, fluid motion and we'll need momentum for it."

Yao worried for a second if Ivan would really be able to hold him if he didn't held back. Yet only a second. Ivan was a tree of a man, taller than most people he knew and everything about him seemed massive and stable.

He took a deep breath. "Alright."

"Oh, one more thing!" Ivan added and Yao's resolve was blown away immediately. "You have to tense up once I grab you. You'll have to become as tense as wood plank once you're above my head. That's how the instructor explained it, anyways."

"A wood plank?" Yao asked.

"You know … like this," Ivan said and began to balance on one leg. He stretched out both of his hands and his other leg.

He staggered and it was not a very graceful performance, but it got the point across – and put a smile on Yao's face. "Alright, I got it."

Ivan got back on both of his feet. "Once I lifted you like this, I could try and spin you, too."

"No, thank you. No spinning! Next thing I know is that you drop me or accidentally slam me into a wall!"

Ivan laughed. Yao could see him clearly shake from across the room and at one point, he wrapped one arm around his own chest.

"I would never do this," he said after he had calmed himself. A chuckle or two still escaped his chest. "Trust me Yao, I'll be careful." He went back to a stable stance and held his arms out.

"Just so we're clear – you will _not_ try to spin me, yes?"

"I won't."

"I'm serious Ivan."

"So am I, Yao."

Yao walked back until his foot hit the wall. As he looked back to Ivan, he wondered why he had agreed to this again.

He took one last deep breath. "Ready?"

"When you are."

Yao ran. He blocked out every part of his surroundings that had nothing to do with his task. The second he felt Ivan's hands on his waist, he jumped. At one go, Ivan lifted him. Yao concentrated on tensing up his entire body.

Everything had seemed incredibly fast and extremely slow all at once. He remembered each single step and sensation that had lead him here and yet, he suddenly hung in the air.

It was an incredibly freeing feeling. He felt his own muscles working, he felt Ivan's grip on him and yet, it was as if he was floating.

Just when he wanted to ask Ivan if he could still hold him, he heard steps from the gym however.

He lost some of the tension. He felt his feet slowly sagging and Ivan's grip felt harder.

The door slammed open and Yao cringed. Their figure began to lose its balance.

"Ivan, why in the hell did you keep us waiting for so long –" Viktoriya said as she stepped through the door.

She looked at them and stopped in her tracks.

Yao felt Ivan's arms shaking and himself slowly sliding down. Before they toppled over, Ivan pulled him closer and put him down.

"Impressive," Viktoriya said. "But someone has to work on their body tension and discipline to keep it up."

"They have a great discipline and control over their body tension. And they would have demonstrated it if it was not for someone's sudden interruption," Yao replied. Viktoriya merely cocked an eyebrow at that.

"You should have seen him, Vicki! He'd make a fantastic Ballerina!" Ivan said.

Yao turned to look at him: "Is there actually a word for a male Ballerina?"

"Ballerino," Ivan and Vicki said at the same time.

"If I remember right," Ivan added.

"You did. But from what I saw, that's not quite fantastic," Viktoriya said.

"Just because you interrupted us! Come on Yao, let's do it once more!"

"Once more?! But I thought," he turned to look at Viktoriya.

Viktoriya leant against the door frame. "Well either you two now show me our wait was worth it or we finally go home."

Yao fixed his shirt. "I definitely won't let you go back and tell the others that it wasn't." He turned around to walk back to the wall and Ivan, with a chuckle, opened his arms again for him.


End file.
